Wednesday, October 3

hope is a funny thing.

hope is a funny thing.  it often starts as a wandering thought, and then develops into a what-if, and if you let it, it becomes a dream.  it's like a little flicker that turns into a small flame and then sometimes overnight grows into a burning desire of your heart. sometimes you have to be careful about hope.  because if you let a thought, a hope, a dream dwell in your heart too deep too long it can become an idol.  a path and plan you're dead set on and not willing to give up.  they're extremely exciting and scary and cautious things, these hopes.  especially in our day and age, there's lots of options of how things can go.  we can have our set plan but there's sooo many resources at our hands and opportunities at our feet.  it's scary to hope too, because it looks and feels so nice but it's not a certainty. no matter how perfect something is in theory in your head, you still never know if it'll happen at all and it almost certainly won't happen how you imagine.  being a planner, i'm especially experienced in the area of idolizing plans and imaginations and hopes.  but at the same time as all this fret and fear that can accompany hope, it's something that we're called to do.  we're told three things will last forever, faith, hope, and love.  of course love is the greatest of these.  but that verse in 1 corinthians (13:13) reminds me that this scary weird exciting hope is not something to suppress.   that hope endures.  that we have hope in His promises.  hope is a human thing along with emotions.  and life will be uncertain as long as we live.  but at the heart of it all, our hope is in God.  in His promises of forgiveness and grace and love and providence.  our hope that we will in no way be disappointed by Him.  that through all our hopes and dreams, He guides it all and provides sovereignly. this time in my life is full of hopes and dreams, from things like homecoming court to grades to graduate school to friendships and relationship. i pray that at the root of all these hopes swirling in my heart would be the hope of Him, the faith that no matter what happens i am in His hand and it will be alright.  whether that means no homecoming court or homecoming queen.  He provides and understands that hope is a funny thing that can do funny things in your heart because He is the source of true hope.

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