Monday, June 29

The next step...

So. My birthday was yesterday. So today I went to the DMV and got my license renewed.  They only asked me once about my health, and I told them that I had sent in the paperwork.  She asked me when I last had a seizure and I said that it's been like three and a half years, so she said nothing more about it.  Thankfully, I got my new license so now I can taper without the state knowing.  
I usually take 5 pills a day, 2 in the morning, 3 at night.  Because I'm all in the clear now, I'm starting to taper.  Tonight I took 2 in the morning and 2 at night! :D  I'll do this for a week, then the next week will be 1 and 2 for a week, then 1 and 1 for a week, then 0 and 1 for a week, then none! :)  
It's really exciting to actually be tapering now, but it's also really scary because who knows what will happen.  Everything could go fine and I won't really even notice.  Or I could feel awful.  Or I could feel fine then have a seizure.  Or I could feel awful then have a seizure.  There's no way to know.  So, the only things I can really do is make sure I take care of myself and pray that everything will work out in the end.  I would definitely love it if I could not depend on meds anymore, but if God's plan is not that, I will def be disappointed, but theres nothing I can do about it.  God is in charge.  And there's nothing I can do that will make him like or love me more, so I just have to have faith.  This whole epilepsy stuff is really just a big test of faith.  :)
I just hope this is the beginning of the end of Amy on drugs...

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