Saturday, December 5

broke.

i am broken. i am human. i can try my best to be perfect and all that jazz. but its never gonna work. i am always gonna be broken in some way. it is the human condition. dont get me wrong. i'm still gonna aspire to be what God wants and such. but i will keep in mind that i am human and everyone of us are broken and will fail and make mistakes. but im totally ok with being broken. because God loves me so much and sees me through Jesus, as perfect, even with all these flaws. i dont know about you, but that takes such a weight off. even when i try really hard, i am going to mess up. but its ok. i'm human. i live in a broken world.
speaking of flaws, i have come to further realize one of mine. i am sensitive and overanalyze pretty much everything. if someone acts the least bit weird to me, i automatically think its my fault or that they dont really like me or whatever. it never seems to pass through my mind that they could just be having a bad day or something... it's really rather annoying. because i overanalyze something (esp people) and then i'm sensitive so it compounds into me feeling like i'm the problem in almost every situation. but i also have the flaw of pride, like every human does. though i can be really introvert and sensitive, i can be really prideful. neither of these really show much on the outside (at least from my point of view...). but its like a constant battle in my mind. between thinking everything is my fault and thinking that i am better than everything. i focus on other peoples faults without recognizing my own, which are just as bad. so yea. i am broken. but like i said before, its all good in the end....
i liked MK's mirror yesterday, it got broken but she glued it back together and kept it to remind her that no ones perfect...
this goes along with the title, but has nothing to do with what i talked about above. i am a college student. this automatically equates into being constantly broke or very tight on money. so. for christmas i'm going the cheaper but possibly more meaningful route. im just gonna make cards and write meaningful personal things inside and add some candy... from the heart, but not so much from the wallet. but i think thats ok. and i'd rather do something thats meaningful ya know? anyway. so yea.

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