thinking...

the last few days have been really good. i've gotten whole shifts at work. worked a stock shift yesterday and got everything folded and organized. so work has been good. nothing real bad, but nothing real great... work... the cru meeting and reflection night were good as always. i went to laurel falls for reflection and loved walking/hiking to it and then exploring the waterfall. also experiencing the slow dim of light as the sun fades. there's something about being by a river or waterfall that makes God seem so much real. His creation in general does that, but water has a special effect on me. last night we had some equipping then found out our jobs and everything for when the staff leave soon. i'm on the outreach team, helping with the outreaches we do on sunday nights to the internationals here. mixed feelings about it, but working through it. i've had some good conversations with a few of the girls in my condo the last few nights. i've decided that when i try the least hard to be deep with someone, it happens the most/easiest. you can't force relationships or real sharing. while the leaders on staff were praying for the students who wisl become the leaders, all the other staff left and then the staff that were still there practically ran out when they were done praying. it was really weird/exciting/scary. we were all alone. it became so much more real that what we're doing is happening. that the staff are leaving. that other students are taking their spots, as leaders, emcees, disciplers... this morning i got to babysit katelynn while jenn went and ran errands and had lunch with angela. it was good. she's such a good baby. she got a bit fussy some, but not without reason like a wet diaper or being hungry or having sore gums from teething. now catching up on the internet now that i have wireless and then relaxing until people come home then we're going to see eclipse! ;)

back to the staff leaving, because that's on my mind. it's just weird. it's exciting that we're taking over, but it's also scary. i think my biggest issue with it isnt that we'll be in charge and control and such, but that they're leaving. like my time with them is over. i won't get to know rachel any better, i won't get to know any of the staff better, and i feel like theres still so much we can learn from them. maybe them leaving will force me to depend even more on my peers and not those older than me. we'll see ;)

it's cooler here the past few days, which is wonderful. it's barable to sit outside. the town is slowly growing as people come in for the 4th of july. i don't think i've told you, but the town's fireworks are being shot off on the concrete pad right next to our condos so we have the prime view! :)